I wanted to submit my application for your love

Published in the Daily Monitor: monitor.co.ug

One day a boda boda rider enjoyed the benefit of my honesty as he took me to my home.

“So, me I’m a Muslim. You must be a Christian?”

“No”.

“Anglican?”

Time for the short cut.

“I don’t believe in religions”.

“WHAT? You don’t pray?”

“No”. I waited for the entertainment to begin.

“So what do you teach your children?”

Oh yeah, here it comes.

“I don’t have any children”, I said.

“You’re still young”, he consoled me. “They will come”.

“It’s not that they will come”, I gave him back his consolation. “It’s that I don’t want them right now”.

“How old are you?” He sounded worried.

“32”.

“But you woman!” he exclaimed. “What about a boyfriend?”

“Don’t have one either”.

“But at least you want one?”, he was worried again.

“Not at the moment, no”.

“I understand”, he consoled. “You must be suffering from heartbreak. He got another wife and she was mean to you?”

My turn.

“In your world you get other women and your wife stays with you?” I asked him.

“But of course!”, he said. “There are things that it’s okay for men to do and if the woman wants to keep her man she must accept”.

“And that’s why I shall remain single”, I told him. “What are you bringing your wives apart from stress? If she stays with you long enough, be sure she may even be having affairs of her own”

“Excuse me Madam”, he said. “I must look at you in the side mirror to see who I’m talking to properly”.

Grinning, I waved at him through said mirror.

“But what’s wrong with me getting other women?”, he pleaded.

“If your wife doesn’t mind, that’s fine”, I told him. “But YOU just told me that she accepts so she can keep you. So would you blame her if she has other men on the side too?”

He laughed.

“I had wanted to submit my application for your love when I first saw you”, he said. “But I can see you are not as nice as you look. You would make a very poor housewife”.

shame.jpg

Oh dear. Let me make my shelf comfortable

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