A dinner to remember

Published in the Daily Monitor: http://www.monitor.co.ug

I was invited one evening to a friend’s birthday dinner at one of the fanciest places in town. There are two stars in this story. The birthday boy who we shall call Peter and his friend who we shall call John.

As I perused the menu I begun to perform my calculations. It looked like I could only afford one olive. But Peter and John were rattling items off to the scribbling waiter like Mark Zuckerberg was our sponsor.

“Erm, let’s see”, they muttered together busily. “We’ll have that. And that. Oooh, this was good last time! Throw that in too”.

Not only was the future bill in my head bringing on an anxiety attack, but the amounts they were ordering were staggering.

“This looks like an awful amount of food”, I whispered delicately. “Also, are you sure you’re looking at the prices?”

“No problem, no problem!”, John said. “This one’s on me. You shall only contribute a little”.

As each item came, we ate. And ate. And ate. And the food just kept coming. Peter and John were starting to look a bit troubled but they chewed on like good soldiers.

“Maybe we did order too much”, John finally confessed. “How many more items are coming?”

“Two”, I said sourly.

Their faces took on a look of horror. They did not have any more space in their stomachs.


Kumbe the table still looked like this

“Waiter!”, they asked. “Can we cancel the last two items?”


The bill came and indeed the amount was representative of our actions. John confidently handed his credit card to the waiter.

“Your card has been rejected”, the waiter said.

“That’s impossible!”, John gasped. “Try again!”.

It was rejected. I begun planning my escape. John asked the waiter to give us a few minutes. When he went away, Peter asked.

“Do you think they’ll notice if we just walk out?”

“Yes”, I said sourly again.

“Well, erm…”, he hesitated a bit before asking. “Who’s going to wash the dishes?!”

5 thoughts on “A dinner to remember”

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