WHERE ON EARTH IS THAT PEPPER SPRAY?

Published in the Daily Monitor: http://www.monitor.co.ug

It was around two in the morning and I was woken from my dream by a dog barking inside my house.

“Tupac!”, I called out sleepily. “Silence!”

My eyes closed and I was drifting back to sleep when my brain registered that my dog was barking. I’d never heard Tupac bark before. I sat up straight, alarmed.

“Why would a dog that’s never barked before start barking for the first time at two in the morning?” I asked myself. Myself answered:

pepper spray1.jpg

There are robbers trying to get in

Quick as a flash, I jumped out of bed.

“Okay, think quickly”, I thought. “Where’s that pepper spray you bought for emergencies?”

I stood and looked around the room, lost, while Tupac barked on. For the life of me, I did not remember where I’d put the pepper spray. I tossed bags and flung open cupboards but could not find the elusive pepper spray.

“What is wrong with you?” My inner voice shouted. “What kind of a dimwit buys pepper spray for emergencies, and doesn’t know where it is when the emergency finally occurs!”

“Leave me alone, I shall find it!”, I begged breathlessly as I run around the part of the house the robbers were not trying to break into. Tupac barked on. How much time did I have?

I opened the corridor door and peeped out. Sure enough, he was barking at the balcony door. I thought I saw the curtains move. I dashed back to my bedroom and peered under the bed, considering creeping under it. But I couldn’t go there weaponless.

I quickly run to the kitchen and grabbed a knife in one hand a meat cleaver in the other. As I was about to run back to the bedroom, it occurred to me that it may be wiser to take the fight to the robbers.

The knives trembling in my hands, I tip-toed to Tupac’s side. He was quiet now that I was there, his body taut, his ears pricked up, his tail wagging in agitation. I quickly threw open the curtains to add the extra shock of surprise for my thieves.

And there sat a cat.

4 thoughts on “WHERE ON EARTH IS THAT PEPPER SPRAY?”

    1. You know? Im always telling people their dogs should sleep inside. That’s how they alert you in advance without all this poisoned meat business.

      Like

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